As 2012 approaches, this would be a great time to spend some thought defining who you are and who you can become. Others are already defining you and they take the lead from how you define yourself. Looking inward at your own definition can make a huge difference in the future.

As an example, we could define Jesus as a man who led a group of 12 other men through the countryside staying with others, never owned anything, only took baths when they could and told other people how to live their lives. If 13 unshaven, burley men showed up at your house, what would you do? (After you called the police!) We worry when 2 men show up trying to give us a magazine and talk religion.

Yet, Christ defined himself as the Son of God. He knew exactly who He was and what his purpose was. He had the confidence and ability to show His definition to all around him. Had He not known this definition, you probably wouldn’t even know His name.

How do you define yourself?

Are you comfortable financially or broke?

Are you a hard worker or are you lazy?

Are you a good father and husband or are you missing in action?

Are people happy to see you or do they scatter when you walk in?

Can you be trusted or are you untrustworthy?

Are you a wandering generality or a meaningful specific?

My list could go on and on. Only you can answer these questions, although the world will be constantly trying to answer them for you. Make your own list of alternate questions and then spend some time honestly answering them. Make 2012 the year that you, like Christ, define who you really are.

Merry Christmas to everyone!

I’ve had several discussions lately about networking. I hear the same excuses over and over. “It’s the same people that go to these events.” “Everyone is there trying to sell you something.” “I never sell anything when I go to those events!” “Groups are always competing for members.” I’m sure you’ve heard all the excuses. That’s why I want to share why I like to attend these events. In my city, we are fortunate that there are so many choices of networking groups to attend.

1. It gets me out of the office meeting new people. Even if many of the same people attend, there are always a few new attendees.
2. I get to make new friends that can become resourses that I trust when I need something done. If I become friends with a realtor, guess who I’ll call when I need one or get asked who is a good realtor.
3. I understand that it’s what happens after the meeting that’s important. I invite new folks to coffee and conversation. Never a sales pitch, just the opportunity to get to know that person better.
4. It keeps me in the public eye. Someone made the comment recently, “You must know everyone in town!” Well, not everyone, but an awful lot. Networking has played a large part in that.
5. It keeps my prospect funnel full. No, I don’t pounce on someone when they attend the same group. You can use the slow-cooker approach or the fast microwave approach. I prefer building the relationship, while at the same time, letting the new attendee know what it is that I do.

Is it worth it? Yes and no. It’s worth it if this is just one way that I use to build my business. To those who use this as the only way to build your business, it’s rare. Some have built their business using only networking, but it needs to be one of many tools that you use. In our city, you could attend 2 networking meetings a day and kid yourself into thinking you are working hard. It doesn’t work that way. Pick wisely and then become loyal to that group! What are your thoughts, fellow networkers?

A young guy from Wisconsin moves to Florida and goes to a big ‘everything-under-one-roof’ department store looking for a job.
The Manager says, ‘Do you have any sales experience?’
The kid says ‘Yeah, I was a salesman back in Wisconsin …’
Well, the boss liked the kid and gave him the job. ‘You start tomorrow. I’ll come down after we close and see how you did.’
His first day on the job was rough, but he got through it.
After the store was locked up, the boss came down. ‘Son, how many customers bought something from you today?’
The kid says, ‘One.’
The boss says, ‘Just one? Our sales people average 20 to 30 customers a day. How much was the sale for?’
The kid says, ‘$101,237.65.’
The boss says, ‘$101,237.65? What the heck did you sell?’
The kid says, ‘First, I sold him a small fish hook. Then I sold him a medium fishhook. Then I sold him a larger fishhook. Then I sold him a new fishing rod. Then I asked him where he was going fishing, and he said down off the coast, so I told him he was going to need a boat, so we went down to the boat department, and I sold him a twin engine Chris Craft Cabin Cruiser. When he said he didn’t think his Honda Civic could pull it, I took him down to the automotive department and sold him that 4×4 Hummer that could.’
The boss said ‘A guy came in here to buy a fish hook and you sold him a new BOAT and a HUMMER?’
The kid said ‘No sir, the guy came in here to buy Tampons for his wife, and I said, ‘Dude, your weekend’s shot, you should go fishing.

One of the most insidious maladies of our time (is); the tendency in most of us to observe rather than act, avoid rather than participate, not do rather than do; the tendency to give in to the sly, negative, cautionary voices that constantly counsel us to be careful, to be controlled, to be wary and prudent and hesitant and guarded in our approach of this complicated thing called living.     Arthur Gordon,  A Touch of Wonder

“Here’s a test to see if your mission on earth is complete: If you’re alive, it isn’t.”
by Richard Bach

I can’t tell you how many people I’ve coached or counseled who are still searching for their real mission on earth. They have their careers and jobs, but have this uneasy feeling that there is more to their life. It took me a great many years to find my mission and at times, I still have some doubts. Maybe you are at that time in your life.

According to Tony Robbins in his Strategic Intervention series, there are 6 human needs that must be met. These can be met in a positive or negative way.

The need for certainty
The need for variety Uncertainty
Significance
Connection/Love
The need for Growth
Contribution

Many I coach, especially when doing Christian Coaching, tell me they want to help others when I ask the standard coaching question, “What would you do if money were no object?”

So the solution sounds like you need to find a mission that will meet your six needs and will involve being of service to others in order to feel like you are finding your mission. Finding that mission is not so much of a search, but rather a series of asking yourself the tough personal questions that will lead to discovery. Prayer and confidence that you will find those answers help. A coach or counselor can help take a shortcut to those questions and help you find the answers. Or… you can let that uneasy feeling keep gnawing at you and maybe someday,   a magic genie will appear with the answers. The journey and the quest is up to you.

One of my favorite acts on America’s Got Talent this season is the Kinetic King. He has spent 36 hours building a Rube Goldberg like device out of popsicle sticks, trash cans and all other kinds of materials each falling in a domino fashion when he starts the chain reaction. He has built some fancy setups and one even failed, but America voted him through anyway.  He has the Robin Williams look and humor and America seems to love him.

As I was watching him do his magic, it remined me of the way many of us build our businesses. We work so hard to get it all set up the way we want it, and then something comes along (like a slow economy) and down it goes. Then we clean up the mess and start all over again.  Two things come to mind to prevent this redundancy.  Loyal Customers and Residual Income.

Loyal customers are the ones who will drive across town past several of your competitors to get to you. They may cut back from time to time, but will be there when you need them to rebuild.

Residual Income is money that comes in even when you are not working. Ask an insurance agent and she’ll tell you about it. Ask many in network marketing and they’ll tell you that is what they are building for the future.  Not all businesses can be set up for residual income, but nothing is harder than making a sale and then starting all over to make another one. If one sale leads into another,  if nothing else but through referrals, it gets so much easier.

So enjoy the Kinetic King. Just don’t use that as your business model.

I have what’s known as “middle age spread.” I am completely aware of it and go to the gym to work on it.

Three times this week I have had people come up to me, pat my stomach and make a comment such as, “I see you’ve been eating well!” or “Been eating too much ice cream?” I usually answer with a flip answer such as, “I’ve spent a lot of money on food getting this belly just where I want it!” I am usually thinking – I can lose my belly, what can you do about being ugly? I guess I’m too nice of a guy to say that out loud though.

Luckily, I have a lot of confidence and can blow off stupid, hurtful statements, but I wonder about those who can’t and are really hurt by such statements.  I never look at those people in the same way again. We all have some imperfection and it makes me wonder why some people immediately pick out that imperfection and attack it. Goes back to my post that appreciation works a whole lot better than criticism.

Most people are like I am, and would never make such a comment. This post is for the rest. Please try and build people up and look for the good in everyone. It will get you a whole lot further in life!

When I was preparing my main keynote speech, “The Attitude of a Business Champion,” I sent a survey to my mailing list asking this question: What quality do you think is most important in a business champion?

I received 100′s of answers and sorted them into the top 5.  My speech was built around those 5 answers and I thought I would share them on this blog.

1. Supreme Confidence
2. Ability to Focus
3. Communication Skills
4. Common Sense
5. Passion

Coming in close were perserverence, a belief in a higher power (God), empathy, curiosity, the ability to prioritize and appreciation.

The speech was easy to write using these 5 areas of development for a business champion adding humor, great stories and audience interaction. Making my audiences aware of these traits was easy. The hard part became leaving the audience with a method or way of improving themselves in each of these areas. I have worked hard to give at least one tip for growing in each area.

The best advice probably came from Ben Franklin. Take each one of the 5 and spend a month developing yourself in that area. It worked for him. Read on the topic and practice it daily. It just may work for you!

In January, I shared a concept called “The Line.”  The idea was that each workday, we spend our time on one side of the line being either productive or non-productive. Here’s how it works:

Draw a line down the middle of a piece of paper.  On the left side write NP (non-productive) at the top of the column. On the other side write P (Productive).   On the left write a list of the non-productive things that you do every day. Some of the items I listed on my sheet were personal errands,  unnecessary doctor visits, Facebook, networking meetings (without a purpose), computer time and things that I can do after normal work hours.

On my right side list are productive things that will lead to a profit and business growth. Some of my list includes speaking (or travel time), meeting with a client, phone calls to clients or potential clients, prospecting, networking with a purpose, writing a book, writing blog, producing CD’s or conducting coaching sessions.

Your list will be entirely different. Then as you spend your day, make sure you are working on the right side of the line. Just like if you were driving a car and veered over the line, the same will happen in your business if you continuously cross the line.  Am I saying be productive 24/7? Absolutely not. Just work hard when you work and play hard when you play and understand there is a difference.

Right now I’m on the right side of the line but I sure feel the pull of checking Facebook trying to pull me over the line. At least now I know there really is a line!

Last week I was having lunch with my son at a Coney Hot Dog restaurant. We were the only ones in the place and had been during the entire lunch. We saw the owner put at least 75 hot dogs on his grill and we both had the same thought – That’s optimism! We asked him about all the hot dogs and he assured us that a rush was coming very soon and the place would be packed. For his sake, I hope he’s right.

As I sit here typing this message on a Saturday, May 21st there are doomsday nutjobs who say the world will end at 6:00pm today. If you are reading this tomorrow, they were wrong. If not, maybe I’m the nut job! Not sure how that fits into optimism as it could go both ways. If you can’t wait for the rapture, then they are being optimistic. Otherwise all those who are joking about it on Facebook are more than likely the optimists.

My message to you today is to adopt an optimistic, glass half full life and things will be a lot more fun and less stressful for you. For several years I was a member of an international group called Optimists. It was fun hanging around positive people and their optimism always seemed to rub off. Part of their creed said,  “Give a smile to every living creature you meet.”  I always thought they should insert the word “human” creature you meet as smiling at ants and birds seemed to be overdoing it.  The philosophy is a good one, however.

Start acknowledging others with a nod, a smile and an encouraging word and like Optimists International, I can promise that your life will improve.